Aug 21, 2009

Posted in Amusing, Current Events, My Fashion, Parenting, Parenting products | 1 Comment

Nipple Tassels Tee for Toddler Girls!?


No, it’s not a Halloween costume. And even if it were, it still wouldn’t make it okay.

This just might be the most inappropriate shirt for an infant/toddler girl I’ve ever seen – and in L.A., I’ve seen lots of crazy sh*t on girls of all ages.

The designer, Suzi Warren of Twisted Twee gave an interview to ParentDish and explained the ironic intent behind her designs:

Warren talked to ParentDish exclusively last night, via email, from her vacation in Spain, to explain her design:

“The Nipple Tassel t-shirt was designed as a response to my own distaste at seeing mini versions of sexy clothes on young children,” she wrote. “Five-year-olds wearing slashed mini skirts and boob tubes, little thumb-sucking Britneys.

“There is nothing very sexy about a baggy, lap neck, long sleeved t- shirt for a 6-month-old. So by embellishing this style of garment with printed nipple tassels, the result is not that the baby becomes sexualized by the tassels, but that the tassels are made benign and silly by the baby. In fact the more inert, innocent and unaware the infant is, the more ludicrous the contrast becomes.”

Oh I see her point now. Make a statement against sexualizing young girls by starting younger and putting stripper clothes on babies and toddlers instead! Of course, why didn’t I think of that!?

The beauty of this plan is that most playgrounds have a jungle gym with plenty of metal poles and bars to act as makeshift stripper poles for your toddler daughter. Maybe if she “ironically” swings those tassels around enough, she can get the preschool boys to stuff lunch money down her pull-up diaper. All in irony, of course. I can picture it now. Early intervention with sexy clothes during the formative years is important for the proper development of future skanks and hoes, er, I mean future Rhodes scholars.

Hurry now! It’s the perfect back-to-school outfit for your feminist-in-training daughter. In case you are worried about the tassels posing a choking hazard to your daughter, the web site also offers “modern child-unfriendly alphabet tees” that depict: “C is for Condom” and “B is for Beer.” And don’t even ask me what X is for, it’s just a photo of a pig mounting a duck.

LINKS: Parent Dish, Twisted Twee 

  1. ABSOLUTELY. I am amazed at the dsisucisons that I’ve had since writing that post. I had no idea people felt so strongly!And, I agree with you and the above commenter, I never doubted my parent’s honesty because they didn’t rat out Santa Claus. I trusted them implicitly despite the fact that the Easter Bunny hid a basket for me until I was a mother, myself.And I stand by my opinion that I believe the pros far outweigh the cons when it comes to keeping a little magic in their lives. Yes, discuss the myth, discuss all of the stories told and what others are saying, but when they look me straight in the face and inquire if I am Santa, I will say I hope not, because then I wouldn’t get anything in my stocking! Thanks Kathryn, for this awesome post!

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